Episode 22: Being an Observer

[00:00:00] Seth: So I was introduced to this concept of becoming an observer through a book I read about meditation. We have a lot going on in our minds that it's relatively infrequent that we're actually paying attention to things outside of them. When I go on walks, the majority of the people that I see on the trail with me are usually plugged into music or talking to someone, which there's nothing inherently wrong with that, but it does highlight to me that we're not generally paying attention to the world around us.

Walks are a great way to work things out in our mind, but there's a deeper level of experience available to us if we are capable of setting aside our inner world in order to observe the world that is immediately around us. A few years back, I tagged along with with someone that was going hunting. I had some property at the time and they wanted to use it.

And I asked if I could just go along. So I went hunting with this guy and we went out there and we sat in a hunting blind, which is, if you, if you're not familiar, it's basically just a camouflage tent with a few places to poke a gun out. And I really had a hard time kind of understanding the appeal.

We just kind of sat there and we didn't really talk, which is hard for me because I like to talk, but I think I understand the appeal now. See, the thing is, if you can manage to leave your mind behind for a second, you can let yourself get enveloped by the sounds, the smells, and the scenery, and time just washes away.

I attempted a while ago to intentionally leave my thoughts behind as I went on a walk, just to become aware of what was around me. I tried not to think, but rather just to experience. And boy, was it an experience. Time really did slip away. I started to notice the bird calls. I, I felt the wind on my skin.

I saw the little movements of the squirrels. That experience was a little bit of a mental reset. And as much as I think it's important that we take action in our lives. There's a kind of intentional inaction that happens when we become an active observer. Not an active thinker, but just an observer. Have you ever noticed that inspired thoughts don't typically arrive from thinking?

I mean, you can think all you want, and a good idea may or may not show up, but rather those thoughts seem to arrive in our minds from who knows where. When you intentionally try to think up good ideas, they prove elusive, but half the time these ideas come while you're in the middle of a shower. feeling the water on you, or on a walk focused on something other than your thoughts.

Some of the greatest thinkers of history had some of their most significant epiphanies while observing something unrelated to whatever the conclusion ended up being. I recently read a book about da Vinci, who was a relentless observer of people and of nature. I mean, if there was any specific trait that that man had, it was, you know, He was an excellent observer, and he was able to accomplish incredible things, because of his incredible capacity to observe.

Newton had an apple fall on his head, allegedly. And for all I know, Einstein was sitting on a toilet when he came up with the theory of relativity. The point here is that the conduit to inspiration is And good ideas is not something that we will into existence. It requires actual patience in a time when everything is a click away.

The lessons we can take from things like meditation are more important than ever. I see our ancestors. They knew the power of this. They didn't necessarily call it meditation, but they knew of it. It was often called prayer. Others experienced it while they sat alone, watching flocks of sheep. Some experienced hunters could almost feel when something was about to happen.

We've been doing this for hundreds of years and our natural environment has always provided ample opportunity for us to experience. The world. For us to have moments where we would be able to observe it. The current climate of today is such that we have stimulus available to us at any given point in time.

The media, the the phones, the internet. It all is just so easy. We can keep ourselves placated easier than ever. But I believe that we're really missing out on something, and I think nature used to force it upon us. Somewhat more than it does now because we're so sheltered within our comfortable homes, within our devices.

I mean, it's rare that we are forced to sit alone and do nothing, and that opportunity doesn't happen very often unless we choose to make it happen. So I think we need to intentionally stop and give ourselves the chance to stop thinking sometimes. Admittedly, this is a skill, but it can be achieved more easily when we do things that take our mind away from their typical triggers.

A walk. A run. Going to a comfortable, private place in our home without anything distracting in it. Maybe a church. Maybe a temple. A place where we can stand in awe of something. As useful as thinking is, it's also the part of us that likes to run in circles. and amplifies negative emotions. Thinking locks us into limiting perspectives.

It keeps us so wrapped up in the future or the past that we waste the present worrying over what is past or has yet to come. If I were on death row, I could spend my time fretting over the end of my life or I could live what I have left of it to the best of my ability. I tend to think that if we really want to live We have to become an observer.

Being an observer also gives you the opportunity to be your own person, to draw your own conclusions. A person can listen to the news, to their friends, to teachers, but there's a kind of visceral knowledge that we experience when we just observe ourselves. What you learn, you may not be able to publish, you may not be able to even adequately describe it to others, but you will learn something, you will gain something from this experience.

And it may not always be something that you can even describe. So when I get stressed, I go for walks and even when I'm not stressed, I still try to go for a walk most days if I can, or at least get outside of the house and, and do something outside. I think I started this back when I was married and, um, whenever I would do it, I'd come back feeling significantly better whenever I did this.

And I think it works because the natural environment is so inherently rich. And good stimuli, that it's hard to keep your mind on distracting things in your life when you start having to breathe harder. It's almost as if your mind realizes it's wasting resources on those negative thoughts and it dedicates just a little more effort to keep oxygen in you and in so doing brings your attention to what's going on around you.

Now, of course, if you're wearing headphones or listening to a story or music, whatever, I mean, I don't think you're going to get quite the same benefit out of it, but I mean, something's better than nothing. So, if you can't kick those pesky thoughts, just pick something to intensely observe and just keep on bringing your attention back to it.

The meditation crowd likes to focus on the breath, which, that works great, but you can choose anything. The point is, is that your attention needs to transfer from the inside of you to something outside of you. Have you ever seen a baby stop crying when you gave it a toy or something made it laugh? As adults, we don't really have anybody that can reliably distract us from our inner turmoil.

So, But that doesn't mean that we can't learn to do that ourselves. So by no means do I want to convey the idea that we should never think on our feelings. But rather, what I'm trying to offer is a pathway to escape from them, when that inward thinking is no longer helping us. Think all you need, but give yourself a break.

No one deserves to live in perpetual anxiety, and we have tools that can help us make it through hard times, and help us thrive in good times, so let's use them. Give your suffering self a break and let your attention shift outward. Seek out good things. Watch the birds. Smell the flowers. Quietly listen for the whispers of God, or the universe.

Find things that make your soul buoyant. Accept the burdens you put on yourself as well as the burdens that others put on you. But don't feel obligated to carry them. No one should have to weigh so heavy all the time. If the balance of your life is more negative than it needs to be, Seek a change. Become an observer and let those answers find you.

What would it be like to stand in a field of flowers on a cool day, soaking up the morning sun as you breathe in that cool morning air? And smell those wonderful flowers without a thought in your head. Assuming, of course, you're not experiencing an allergic reaction, which I know a lot of us have to deal with.

But what would it be like to stand in a warm desert as the sun begins to set, and the sky turns red and orange, and the mountains turn gray, and the shadows grow long on the ground? How would it feel to be sitting on a boat in the middle of the ocean watching a rainstorm, miles away, As the sun rays break through the nearest clouds, as you breathe in that salt air on a balmy summer day.

There's a kind of beauty in most places that you can find, but you have to open your eyes, your ears, and sometimes even your nose. Do what you need to do to escape the prison of your mind and embrace the things that will wake up the best version of yourself. And I hope you can find the place where you can become that observer.